Friday, March 26, 2010

Jellyfish: 1, Humans: 0....

So if you haven't heard, which you probably haven't, immortality is no longer science-fiction. Well, at least for one species. Apparently despite all of mankind's best efforts to fight off our greatest enemy - old age - it would seem that some random jellyfish the size of a finger just happened to figure it out on accident. Scientists have discovered an immortal jellyfish.

Well, potentially. It would seem that the jellyfish aren't smart enough to know that they're dying from old age, but if you poke them the wrong way, they will revert back to their child-state at the drop of a hat. So in a nutshell, they return to being a newborn jellyfish and start their life all over again, without actually dying.

As interesting as this news tends to be, it more or less shows how ironic life can turn out.

Here we are thinking we're at the top of our game. We've got computers, cars, guns and chocolate chip cookies. I mean, we're what every other species wishes it could be. Yet with all of our dazzling lights and shiny plastic achievements, we cannot escape death from simple age. And here some little jellyfish that doesn't even realize there's anything above the top of the ocean goes and simply becomes immortal because it feels like it. How's that for a 6 to 24 tentacle slap to the face, eh?

Of course, the scientists are saying that no research is being done on figuring out how this trait can benefit humans. Right. If I found the fountain of youth, I'd only be interested in the historical aspects as well. Hold on, I forgot something: </bullshit>

I would hope someone's digging around in these little fuckers for some answers. I mean sure, we pretty much know how they do it, but even so, it's not something you come across every day. There's something more to be drawn from this other than "Well golly, ain't that fascinating!" Chances are there's not going to be much to work with and some little fucking sea creature is going to sit back and mock us from it's little glass tube while we rot away trying to figure out it's little secret.

Am I jealous? Fuck yes. It's not fair, damnit. Why does some little blob of cells with no comprehension that it's even really alive get to have immortality, when people like me, who have a lot of shit to do and not a lot of time to do it have to suffer with getting about 30 or 40 solid years of enjoyment before I become too old to stand upright without breaking something?

I don't really hate the little fuckers though, I mean it's not like they did anything wrong. But it still seems like a complete waste. Nature's stupidity strikes again!


  1. Interesting, I wonder how hard you hafta get poked to revert back to your childhood?....

  2. well, I could tell you how you can live on the earth for ever and never get old...but would you believe me? =)