Sunday, January 31, 2010

One would think...

So, Apple released a new product not to long ago. If you haven't heard they released the iPad. What is the iPad? Well, from the looks of it, it's a big brother of the iPod that supposedly does more than the iPhone, and has similar features to the iMac but with feel of an iBook.

So when is Apple going to release the iDon'tCare?

Because I don't. Because basically what they're selling is the same device they've already made 4 or 5 times, only this one is bigger. Yay? It's not like it actually adds anything to the market we haven't already seen. Sorry guys but Nintendo already wowed the crowds with touch screen technology years ago. The only practical use the thing has is being a portable web-browser that doesn't have all the extra things a computer normally does. It apparently runs apps like an iPhone, but can't make phone calls. Great, so what I'm getting from Apple's current stratagy is instead of releasing one product that simply does everything that Apple's current technology is capable of, they're releasing individual products that if you buy them all can give you the same abilities you can get on a regular Dell Laptop. Oh, well except the touch screen. You win that one, Apple. Huzzah for you.

But seriously, what is the point of releasing this thing except for the fact that people are getting bored with all their other iProducts and need something else to waste their money on? The thing doesn't even support Flash. How do you build a portable web browser that DOESN'T SUPPORT FLASH?! 98% of the web uses Flash and yet Apple in it's infinite wisdom passed down from ancient gods who's names can not be pronounced on this plane of existence has decreed that Flash is unnecessary for web-browsing, just like a second mouse button serves no purpose on a computer since you have a keyboard full of buttons and were butthurt because the Windows key didn't do anything on their machines, so they forced you to hold down their 'command' button (i.e. windows key) to right click on anything. As you can tell, I'm not a fan of Apple. The only thing that makes any reasonable sense in this strategy is that Apple has plans to release a yet unknown number of iDevices and when the final one is released (Probably some time in 2012) they will all join together in some Voltron-esque fashion and become the iDestroyer, slayer of mankind and destroy the world in a flurry of multicolored plastic death.

Needless to say, Apple is once again trying to flaunt it's superiority in the field of creating shit that has already been done but isn't yet available in Bubblegum Pink. And people will buy it. Because people are stupid.

1 comment:

  1. Ah the iPad …with just the dab of a fingertip wonderful things can happen ….or so Apple would like us to believe about this "ground-breaking" product.

    But why, I can't understand is the external styling so vapid. I mean with all that "power under the hood" why didn’t they give it a look that would really pull the “fuckin’ hell” factor?
    Why did the designers think people would relish the thought of tip-tapping away or gliding a delicate fingertip over a flat plastic slate for hours on end? Is this really the aspiration of modern user interface design - to reduce to a few twitching muscles the extent of physical effort required for operating these wonder-toys.
    And anyway, what if I LIKE pressing buttons?

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